anorthodox: 2008

My Terrible Affliction

Guess what it is before the end of the strip.

Google Bombing

Visit these even if you don't know what they're saying. Put the same links on your website, blog or whatever. Translate them if you care enough into your own language (they're in greek).

Merry Fucking Christmas

And we will light fires. And they will all come together. And a big one will be born. So big it will be, that Saturn himself will be able to see it.

The bullet connects at last
Let freedom ring with a shotgun blast
-Machine Head, Davidian

Infanticide

By virtually wiping out the ‘male stock’, tribal women hope they can avoid deadly bow-and-arrow wars between the villages in the future.

‘Babies grow into men and men turn into warriors,’ said Rona Luke, a village wife who is attending a special ‘peace and reconciliation’ meeting in the mountain village of Goroka.

‘It’s because of the terrible fights that have brought death and destruction to our villages for the past 20 years that all the womenfolk have agreed to have all new-born male babies killed,’ said Mrs Luke.

‘The women have had enough of men engaging in tribal conflicts and bringing misery to them.’

This is what two neighbouring villages in Papua New Guinea have decided is the best way to solve the problem of chronic conflict. And I still can't decide whether it's the most ingenious or idiotic thing I've ever heard. (Actually I can, but it's an impressive idea nonetheless)

Solar-Powered Sea-Slug or The Great Gene Kleptoplasty

Here is an article about the hybrid slug that becomes photosynthetic by eating algae.

HYBRID SLUG!!!

Masturbatorium

Ok, since we are in the area of penises and dicks, guess what this contraption was used for. I'll give you a clue, it was used during the Victorian era and it isn't a toaster.

NO MONKEY BUSINESS!!!

The Vampire of Düsseldorf

Pardon me for indulging in the very common habit of posting for serial killers, but this was an exceptionally sick puppy brought to my attention by Anthony Neilson's play, Normal.

Peter Kürten was a very naughty boy indeed.

"Tell me, after my head has been chopped off, will I still be able to hear, at least for a moment, the sound of my own blood gushing from the stump of my neck?...that would be the pleasure to end all pleasures." -Peter Kürten, Last words

Penisburgers!!!

Picture courtesy of A & A. (notice the detail, hehe)

Free Man on Earth

Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend. -Albert Camus

Flower of Passion

Bo Tat Thich Quang Duc

Resistance is Fertile

Is this the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?
Yes. Yes it is.

Visit CrimethInc.

It's the Halloweenies!

I need a rising sound (or Wheel: the Best Thing since Fire)

Look at the toe family! Look at them! I drew them on my girlfriend's toes! I would be embarassed (hehe I said ass), only I have no shame.

TOE FAMILY!!!

Corporate Bailout: Denied!

Here is my view on what we should do with banks, as sung by Tom Green:

I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill.

I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill.

I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill.

I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill.

I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off
I'm gonna throw the piggy off the hill.

I'm gonna throw the piggy off,
I'm gonna throw the piggy off,
I'm gonna throw the-
I'm gonna throw the piggy off.

Oh Irony, Thy Name is Universe

1984: Casper Schmidt writes "The Group-Fantasy Origins of AIDS", which is published by the Journal of Psychohistory. He posits that AIDS is an example of "epidemic hysteria" in which groups of people are subconsciously acting out social conflicts, and compares it to documented cases of epidemic hysteria in the past which were mistakenly thought to be infectious. Schmidt himself died of AIDS in 1994.

1994, 28 October: Robert Willner, a physician whose medical license was revoked for, among other things, treating an AIDS patient with ozone therapy, publicly jabs his finger with blood he says is from an HIV-infected patient. Willner dies the following year of a heart attack.

1998: Valerie Emerson, of Bangor, Maine, prevails in court in Maine for her right to refuse to give AZT to her 4-year-old son Nikolas Emerson, after she witnessed the death of her daughter Tia, who died at the age of 3 in 1996. Nikolas Emerson died eight years later.

How the mighty have fallen

Go Shell. Go to hell.

MEND this, fuckers.

Shibari

You turned my heart into an orchard...

And I do walk upon this land...

Basso Profondo: Vladimir Pasuik & Viktor Wichniakov

Beefcake

This is the first in a fearless army of robots that will help me take over the world and then rule with an iron fist. Iron Fist I tell you!

The Godmachine

John Murray Spear's first and most important task, set to him by the Electricizers (the spirits of certain people including Benjamin Franklin), was the construction of the New Messiah. It would be built on High Rock Hill in Lynn, a town north of Boston, MA.

High Rock Cottage, where the New Messiah would be built, belonged to the Hutchinsons, who were both spiritualists and reformers. Assisting Spear and the Electricizers was a group that included Rev. S.C. Hewitt, editor of the Spiritualist newspaper New Era; Alonzo E. Newton, editor of the New England Spiritualist; and a woman called “the Mary of the New Dispensation”. The identity of the New Mary has never been clear. Nobody knows still who “Mary” was.

Bringing the Messiah into life involved four-steps. First, Brother Spear entered a “superior state” during which he was given plans from the Electricizers. Building it required nine months for construction (gestation) and in that time he received 200 ‘revealments’ providing detailed instructions on the materials to be used, how the different parts should be shaped and the pieces put together. The parts would be carefully machined from copper and zinc, and the total cost would eventually reach $2,000.

No images of the New Motive Power exist, but apparently it was impressive, sitting on a big dining room table. “From the center of the table rose two metallic uprights connected at the top by a revolving steel shaft. The shaft supported a transverse steel arm from whose extremities were suspended two large steel spheres enclosing magnets. Beneath the spheres there appeared a very curiously constructed fixture, a sort of oval platform, formed of a peculiar combination of magnets and metals. Directly above this were suspended a number of zinc and copper plates, alternately arranged, and said to correspond with the brain as an electric reservoir. These were supplied with lofty metallic conductors, or attractors, reaching upward to an elevated stratum of atmosphere said to draw power directly from the atmosphere. In combination with these principal parts were adjusted various metallic bars, plates, wires, magnets, insulating substances, peculiar chemical compounds, etc. At certain points around the circumference of these structures, and connected with the center, small steel balls enclosing magnets were suspended. A metallic connection with the earth, both positive and negative, corresponding with the two lower limbs, right and left, of the body, was also provided.”

In addition to the “lower limbs”, the motor was equipped with an arrangement for “inhalation and respiration.” A large flywheel gave the motor a professional appearance. This, however, was only a working model; the final version would be much bigger and cost 10 times as much.

The metal body was then lightly charged with an electrical machine resulting in a “slight pulsatory and vibratory motion observed in the pendants around the periphery of the table”. Following this treatment, the Engine was exposed to carefully-selected individuals of both sexes, who were brought into its presence one at a time in order to raise the level of its vibrations.

Then Spear encased himself in an elaborate construction of metal plates, strips and gemstones and was brought into gradual contact with the machine. For one hour he went into a deep trance which left him exhausted and, according to a clairvoyant who was present, created “a stream of light, a sort of umbilicum” that linked him and the machine.

It was at this time that the New Mary began exhibiting symptoms of pregnancy. The spirits instructed her to appear at High Rock on 29 June 1854 for the final stage of the experiment. On the appointed day, she arrived and lay on the floor in front of the engine for two hours, experiencing labour pains. When they ended she rose from the floor, touched the machine and it showed signs of… something. Precisely what happened is not clear; Spear claimed that for a few seconds the machine was animate.

The machine’s movements remained feeble, but this was attributed to the “electrical infant” being a newborn; the New Mary began providing it with maternal attention while it gained strength. It’s hard to imagine what this involved. Despite the headlines, visitors to High Rock were unimpressed. JH Robinson – in a letter to the Spiritual Telegraph – pointed out that the New Messiah could not even turn a coffee-mill; despite claims of success, A.E. Newton admitted there was never more than a slight movement detected in some of the hanging metal balls.

The Electricizers suggested that a change of air would provide the machine with a more nourishing environment – so the Messiah was dismantled and moved to Randolph, New York, where “it might have the advantage of that lofty electrical position.” In Randolph, it was put into a temporary shed, but a mob broke in, trampled the machine, tore it apart, and scattered the pieces.

Nothing of it survived.

The Pretty Face of Justice or How to Deal with Piggies

Luciano Benjamin Menendez, one of the few, highest ranking officers of the Argentinian army during the military dictatorship and piggy extraordinaire, was sentenced to life imprisonment in a common prison with common criminals. Hopefully this will happen more often.

Bipolar Bear

Hehe, get it?

Pimp My Crab

Oh yeah. They went there. I get the picture of a Horseshoe Crab scuttling along the sea-floor with a blue neon light shining under it. Diseased.

Southpark - The Aristocrats

This is the best version of The Aristocrats I have had the dubious pleasure to hear. Enjoy.

Radio Pirate Artichoke

Randomly spreading the Disease via Shoutcast. The best thing since anthrax, plastic explosives or funny smelling anarchists. Better than any kind of biochemical or nuclear WMD. Because it actually exists. Get it? It exists. Haha, fucking hilarious. Anyway, Radio Pirate Artichoke. Hooray for childhood dreams that come true. Space word.

Burning Witch Live

Spore Creature Creator: pt 3

In order to strengthen my dark master's campaign for the upcoming presidential elections, I have produced a creature in Spore Creature Creator that resembles his Dark Majesty. Cthulhu for President.

It's only funny if it's in metric...

Right. So me and some friends that I haven't seen for some time, got together and were talking smack. And we came up with the singular, most effective way to ruin your child's life. And make them hate you. Forever and ever. And ever. And this is by giving them the appropriate name. Now listen as I impart my wisdom. This is our imaginary child's full name:

Fontleroy Felix Edward Lloyd Arthur Titus Ignatius Optimus Smythe-Boddington.

or as known by friends: Font F.E.L.A.T.I.O. Smythe-Boddington.

Go on. Ruin your child's life.

When dogs are better people than humans

Rest easy dude.

He has come for your firstborn

This is a gameplay video of Diablo III. Oh yeah. You heard. Glory and approbation to Diablo, Lord of Terror and Leader of the Three.

Here is part 1:

and here is part 2:

Gorge yourselves my filthy poopminions!

Meat Puppets - Lake of Fire

Where do bad folks go when they die?
They don't go to heaven where the angels fly
They go to a lake of fire and fry
Wont see 'em again till the 4th of July

Leila the Hijacker

Leila Khaled was born in 1944 in Haifa, then part of the British Mandate of Palestine. Khaled's family fled to Lebanon during the 1948 Palestinian exodus, leaving her father behind. At the age of 15, Khaled became one of the first to join the radical pan-Arab Arab Nationalist Movement, originally started in the late 1940s by George Habash, then a medical student at the American University of Beirut. The Palestinian branch of this movement became the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine after the 1967 Six-Day War.

On August 29, 1969 Khaled was part of a team that hijacked TWA Flight 840 on its way from Rome to Athens, diverting the Boeing 707 to Damascus. She claims she ordered the pilot to fly over Haifa, so she could see her birthplace, which she could not visit. No one was injured, but the aircraft was blown up after hostages had disembarked. According to some media sources, the PFLP leadership thought that Yitzhak Rabin, the Israeli ambassador to the United States would be on board. This was however denied by Leila Khaled and others. After this hijacking, Khaled underwent the first of several plastic surgeries intended to conceal her identity.

U.S. of A., Home of the Twinkie Defense

The expression "Twinkie Defense" derives from the 1979 trial of Dan White, a former San Francisco, California Supervisor who assassinated Mayor George Moscone and City Supervisor and gay rights activist Harvey Milk on November, 1978.

Let us all follow blindly the shining beacon of democracy that is USA. Cunts.

Show Friendliness

A new monster is in our midst. Or at least will be in a few days. Joss Whedon has created a super-duper internet mini-series that will be totally free. My favorite price! Cabbages! Click on the image to be magically transported (unicorns are involved) to the official interweb page.

Now your souls belong to Dr. Horrible! Hooray!

The Sinking Belle and The Sweet Hereafter

Sunn O))), Boris and Jesse Sykes, thank you for this. I will put my children to bed to the sound of the Sinking Belle.

Spore Creature Creator: pt 2

Another one of them crazy critters. Yay! Leprechauns!

On your way to Oblivion...

...always take the scenic route.
-Satan Burger, Carlton Mellick III

There is no Excellent Beauty...

...that hath not some strangeness to the proportion.
-Francis Bacon

Spore Creature Creator

This is my very first creation with the Spore Creature Creator. More will follow. Enjoy!

Why vote for the lesser evil?

Why indeed.

Smedley Darlington Butler was a pussy

"War is a racket.

It always has been. It is possibly the oldest, easily the most profitable, surely the most vicious. It is the only one international in scope. It is the only one in which the profits are reckoned in dollars and the losses in lives.

A racket is best described, I believe, as something that is not what it seems to the majority of the people. Only a small "inside" group knows what it is about. It is conducted for the benefit of the very few, at the expense of the very many. Out of war a few people make huge fortunes."

-Smedley Darlington Butler, War Is A Racket

The One Electronic

Visit www.rice-boy.com for an epic surrealistic adventure.
Legendary!

I do wish there was a printed copy but free will do just as well. Enjoy.

(anarchism)

Bloody Panda - Pheromone

Like Thorr's Hammer only cleaner production and eastern influences.
Epic album, doomy doom-doom.
Go fetch.
www.bloodypanda.com

(anarchism)

The finger-pyramid of evil contemplation

Join me my minions!
Join me in evil contemplation!
Eeeeeeeeeeeevil!

(Lest we forget: anarchism)

Flinging the Monkey (or Watching the Watchers)

It has been two wretched years since I have cursed the interweb community with this audiovisual abomination that some of you may call a blog (Ha!). It also has been a while since I spilled any kind of venomous bile at your general direction and you should be thankful (you insolent sapheads!). Fear not my faithful, grovelling minions. I am here, ever watchful of your misdemeanors and your certain deviations from the shining path of monster-trucks.

It has recently come to my attention (what kind of benevolent despot would I be, had I not my trusty ruffians) that I am being watched. Shut up! I am not paranoid! I have proof! I hope some of you actually watched the documentary on the history of spanish anarchism and enjoyed it, I know I did. It appears though, that someone didn't. Namely Google. Apparently, the word anarchism must trigger some kind of detection mechanism at their HQ warning them about potential... gasp!... terrorists!
Pathetic, just sad. In fact it's so nauseatingly miserable I'm not even going to comment on it... Oh wait... I already did.
Anyway, here are the IPs my blorg (oh yeah, it's a blorg from now on) was accessed from. If I lose privacy by being watched over whenever someone doesn't like what I say, I think it's only fair they loose some in return.

66.249.70.153
66.249.85.133
72.14.195.49

Have fun!

Oh and: anarchism, bomb, anthrax, meatpies.

You cheesecake-scented goddess, you!

This is the face of homophobia.
This is George Sanidas.
Piss on him and may he leave no offspring.

Phoenix descending

To Mars my brethren!

Ouroboros is broken

Can't you see I'm trying to draw little piggies?

Great Open Spaces

We'll drive. Keep driving. Head out to the middle of nowhere, take that road as far as it takes us. You've never been west of Philly, have ya? This is a beautiful country Monty, it's beautiful out there, like a different world. Mountains, hills, cows, farms, and white churches. I drove out west with your mother one time, before you was born. Brooklyn to the Pacific in three days. Just enough money for gas, sandwiches, and coffee, but we made it. Every man, woman, and child alive should see the desert one time before they die. Nothin' at all for miles around. Nothin' but sand and rocks and cactus and blue sky. Not a soul in sight. No sirens. No car alarms. Nobody honkin' atcha. No madmen cursin' or pissin' in the streets. You find the silence out there, you find the peace. You can find God. So we drive west, keep driving till we find a nice little town. These towns out in the desert, you know why they got there? People wanted to get away from somewhere else. The desert's for startin' over.

-James Brogan, 25th Hour

Attack of the Giant Mousaka

This is so stupid it makes me want to rip my own eyes out. In the nicest possible way. Or maybe not. This is a greek film with french subtitles so if you don't know either language, it's not going to make much sense. Mind you, it wont make much sense even if you do speak either language, but there you go. In fact, I'm not quite sure why I'm posting this.