SatanOscillateMyMetallicSonatas

Luigi Russolo was a great man and one can only hope that one day all artists will be as open-minded as he was and all people will be as receptive to art as he was. What do you mean you don't know who he was? Fine, here's the goddamn link.

Many thanks must be given to pioneering behemoths in the land of art. One of the most modern ones being Sunn o))). Above is the wall they have created and that has caught us all in its thrall.

On a lighter note: If you like farty sounds or music that sounds like farts or farting in general or even if you're looking for a decent immature laugh, here is the Grand Master Thunderbuns, the Lord of Fart, the one and only Le Pétomane. Go on, click on it.

And allow me to exit with a lyrical touch:

Clutch - Binge and Purge

Perhaps it's just the way the light falls
But everything looks like a target to me
And I don't know where the gun is
But I'm certain that it's pointed at me

And in the jungle, wretched jungle
They say the lion eats tonight
And all around it is a colliseum
Dripping with a voracious appetite

I say hey there, fella
Whose soul are you tormenting now?
Hey there, fella
Whose soul are you tormenting now?

In the course of all the previous events
It is evident that something's bound to happen
Come on, rear your ugly head to me
I've got nothing to lose but my apathy

The root of the problem has been isolated
The root of the problem has been isolated
The root of the problem has been isolated
The root of the problem has been isolated

Come on, motherfucker
Come on, motherfucker
Come on, motherfucker
Let's throw down

Anything Jesus Does I Can Do Better

This is a picture of two mating leopard slugs. They are both hermaphrodite and that phosphorescent blue flower that seems to be growing out of both of their heads is their entangled penises.

That's right they're exchanging semen and they have their dicks on the side of their heads. You should see this in motion (get a copy of David Attenborough's 'Life in the Undergrowth' NOW!!!) it is beautiful beyond words.

Oh! and the whole thing is happening upside-down while hanging from a rope made of their mucus.

Every single time I am dumbfounded...

Here you go ya ignorant bastards! Enlighten yourselves! Click here to commence the slug-shagging!

Feel-bad hit of the Winter (He who accepts all that is offered)

In our temple I perform the libations
With some dark and obscure connotations
We want kisses and hugs
Like hermaphrodite slugs
Yet we need no divine approbations

They say all good things are eleven
Tonight we make love like we're brethren
We demand sacrifice
Simple love wont suffice
For tonight we wage war against heaven

Hush little baby...

Like bottle-glass scraping 'cross the pavement

A small life ended, eyes glazed, mouth half-open

Crimson halo, the truth exiting the mouth at its own pace

Saliva and blood on cold and wet cement

Just because some cunt couldn't care less

And everytime I pass, my daemon wants to stare, but my hand thinks otherwise and shields my eyes, a little body broken, empty

Thrown away like a used condom

You look like a saint, cold, removed and oh-so beautiful

I pray you found oblivion, I don't know what I pray to but nonetheless I pray

And I can't help but wince

But maybe it's for the best

(For all the little lives that are much bigger than any one of us thinks)

Exit light, Enter the night

I don't know how to say this...
I suppose the best way would be to just say it...
I... I... I don't...
I don't have anything to bitch about!
I know I know, there's plenty of things to bitch about, but I don't feel like it...
Finally, things are falling into place and the universe is conspiring with me and not against me.

Dodge Swinger 1973, Galaxy 500,
All the way stars' green, gotta go.
Dodge Swinger 1973, top down, chassis low,
Panel dim, light drive, Jesus on the dashboard.
T-minus whenever it feels right, Galaxy 500.
Planets align, a king is born.

Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right

Dodge Swinger 1973, top down, chassis free,
Buzz Aldrin, Armstrong, or maybe just me.
Don't worry, it's coming.
Don't worry, it's coming.
Jesus on the dashboard.

Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right
I turn on the radio.

Hey kid, are you going my way?
Hop in, we'll have ourselves a field day.
We'll find us some spacegrass,
Lay low, watch the universe expand.
Skyway, permanent Saturday.
Oh, by the way, Saturn is my rotary.
Hop in, it'll be eternity
Till we make it to M83.

Once around the Sun, cruising, climbing.
Jupiter cyclops winks at me, yeah, he knows who's driving.
Hit neutral in the tail of a comet.
Let the vortex pull my weight.
Push the seat back a little lower.
Watch light bend in the blower.
Planets align.
A king is born.
Dodge Swinger.
Jesus on the dashboard.

Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right
Whenever it feels right

T-minus whenever it feels right...

Why can you not let go?
Why do you cry when something breaks?
A duvet is just a blanket, not comfort, nor love, a blanket. A sofa is planks of wood and cushions. Not a problem solved.
Let go. Just let go. And then you might have a near-life experience.
Ah! The world I see...

A hand is a saviour. A messiah brought on by your desperate cries. It lifts the burden of emptiness and wipes your stigmata clean of sorrow.

A door is a passage. Neither here nor there. In between.

A mouth is a haven.

In the end, the house always wins. But you don't have to play against the house. Oh for a Dartswinger, my kingdom for a Dartswinger.