The things you own, end up owning you...

The guy who invented IKEA
I hope he gets gonorrhea
May he lose but one ball
And his dick, shrink and fall
For having this horrendous idea

Avast ye scurvy dogs!

There was an old pirate who was fluent in Thai
Who walked on a peg-leg and saw with one eye
He sailed many seas
Caught a venereal disease
But tragically choked on a pie







The cucumber suicides

There was a cucumber
With a fetish for lumber
Who was often the victim of strife
People called him a veggie
Gave him many a wedgie
And sadly, he took his own life

Under your bed

The ghouls that are under your bed
They come from the Land of the Dead
They know you're alone
But don't whimper or moan
They'll leave just as soon as they've fed

It's more than just a game...

It's in our head...
Mostly.

The rest is circumstance, priorities and possibilities.

There was a small boy
With a devious ploy
To rid this poor world of its sorrow
Above or underground
He still hasn't found
A nuclear device he can borrow

I hope she will be mine...

Stone Sour - Omega

What a skeletal wreck of man this is

Translucent flesh and feeble bones
The kind of temple where the whores and villains
Try to tempt the holistic tomes

Running rapid with free thought to free form
In the free and clear
Where the matters at hand are shelled out like lint at a laundromat
To sift and focus on the bigger, better, now

We all have a little sin than needs venting
Virtues for the rending
And laws and systems
And stems ariff from the branches of office
Do you know what your post entails?

Do you serve a purpose?
Or purposely serve?

Lying down inside of your attavistic galore
The value of a Summer spent
And a Winter earned

For the rest of us there is always Sunday.
The day of the week that reeks of rest
But all we do is catch out breaths
So we can wade naked into the bloody pool
And place our hand on the big black book.

To watch the knives zig-zag between our aching fingers.

A vacation is a count-down
T-minus your life and counting
Time to drag your tongue across the sugar-cube
And hope you get a taste

What the FUCK is all this for?! (What the hell is goin' on?!)
SHUT UP!!

I could go on and on, but, lets move on shall we?

Say, you're me and I'm you
And they all watch the things we do
And like a smack of spite
They threw me down the stairs
Haven't felt like this in years
The great magnet of malicious magnanimous refuse
Let me go and
Punch me into the dead spot again.

Thats where you go when theres' no one else around
It's just you
And there was never anyone to begin with now was there?

Sanctimonious pretentious dastardly bastards
With their thumb on the pulse
And a finger on the trigger

CLASSIFIED MY ASS! that's a FUCKING secret and you know it!

Government is another way to say
Better
Than
You.

It's like ice but no pick
A murder charge that won't stick
It's like a whole other world
Where you can smell the food
But you can't touch the silverware

Hah, what luck
Fascism you can vote for
Isn't that sweet

And we're all gonna die some day
Because thats the American way
And I've drunk too much
And said too little
When your gaffer taped in the middle
Say a prayer, save face
Get yourself together and (see whats happening)
SHUT UP! (FUCK YOU!)
FUCK YOU!

I'm sorry, I could go on and on but
It's time to move on, so

Remember your a wreck, an accident
Forget the freak, you're just nature

Keep the gun oiled and the temple clean
Shit, snort and blaspheme
Let the heads cool and the engine run

Because in the end,
Everything we do
Is just everything we've done.

I am so full of anger (and nicotine)...

And pasta and chocolate and epithelial cells...
Alex receives the bitchslapping like a gentleman, although he clearly isn't one...
I have been called stupid, ugly, an asshole I have even been called a bright young man (don't worry the guy who said it is dead, I made sure he was), my sexuality has come into question and people have said bad things about my family.

But nothing...
Nothing
hurts as bad as being rejected by a chick you like...
Go on, roll eyes and speak bullshit, at least half the population of this planet knows what I'm talking about.
Bitchslapped all the way back to the beginning of time and space...

Now to find a funky picture...
Ooooh yeah... That's more like it... I feel a bit better now...
Fling that pork-griller son... Fling it like you mean it...
I wanna burn stuff...